When you've lost a child, there are things you hold on to. The crayon markings on the wall I haven't cleaned off because Sweet Baby made them. The pregnancy test from the baby that died at 7 weeks gestation.
Even the marks that Mara left on my body from the emergency surgery to save my life; these are things I hold on to. That I look at and remember; I am changed because of this.
But, sometimes, it's all too easy for me to forget the ones who are here. I mourn too deeply sometimes to see the beauty in front of me, the everyday moments that are amazing, magical, miraculous.
So today, in spite of all the losses....or perhaps because of the losses, I need to remember what I have.
I need to remind myself of the miracles that surround me, like the little girl, so joy-filled that spring has finally sprung that she cannot go to the car without stopping by her slide. Every time. She screams if we pull her away before she gets her slide in. Even when the slide is wet (like today).
These moments of childhood, they're what I need to pay attention to; what I need to remember:
Remember the joy too.
Stop by Clan Donaldson for more Theme Thursday and Surviving Our Blessings for your #holylens prompts (week 5 below). Also stop by my giveaway for a chance to win an embroidered necklace from Jenna's place :)