Theme Thursday/Third Person Thursday - a day late.
Thanksgiving was just around the corner. Annery set aside all day Wednesday to make pies for her family's feast. She was up early, sorting through ingredients for the four varieties her family would enjoy; caramel apple, pumpkin, pudding pie, and cheesecake.
In addition to the pies she'd agreed to make, Annery's daughter, Little Bean, had added a special request; jello.
With water heating and pies baking, the day was running oh so smoothly. Then, the phone rang. It wasn't family or friends calling to say "hello". It was a phone number that sent panic straight to the heart of her, surely something must be wrong with Sweet Baby for that number to be on her phone.
Annery answered the phone, panic setting in. The voice on the other end quickly reassured her that Sweet Baby was fine, in fact, the voice wondered, could Sweet Baby possibly get her hair done today? Annery pondered her plans for the day, would she have enough time to bake all the pies and spend over two hours in transporting and styling the precious Sweet Baby? She would make it work.
A few hours later, Annery was driving 30 minutes across town to pick up Sweet Baby. Sweet Baby now goes to a new daycare, and it took Annery a bit of time to find the actual location. Once inside and past the ID and sign-in station, Annery took a couple wrong turns on her way to SB's classroom.
At last, the correct door in the labryinth located, Annery peered inside. She scanned the room to find SB. THERE, there she was, playing with two baby dolls at once and smiling. Annery hadn't seen her in over a week. The sight of SB so happy and at ease in a new setting both relieved her and pierced her heart in one moment. Her baby was okay. Then, SB spotted her. The toddler shrieked with delight and yelled, "MAMA!". A little crack in Annery's heart sealed. Her baby had missed her.
SB went wild with delight, laughing and running around her preschool room. After "hiding" behind a rocking chair, SB was delighted when Annery swooped her up. Sweet Baby pointed to all the many items of interest around the classroom, showing them all off with pride.
Finally, the initial delight subsided enough to get a wriggling 2 year-old into her winter gear. Then, walking hand in hand, Annery and Sweet Baby set off.
The ensuing hour covered highs and lows. Sweet Baby, always the busy bee, had a hard time sitting still through the hour of hair braiding necessary to bring her beautiful hair into the requested style. Yet, the worst was still to come.
After little more than an hour in her home, it was time to put on coats, shoes and hats and get her back to her new home. SB resisted the idea at every turn. Annery's youngest sister had spent the day helping Annery with the girls, and her heartbreaking plea as her aunt placed SB in her carseat was, "don't leave me!".
Annery stepped in to buckle SB into her carseat. SB went wild. She cried and clawed in the direction of the house, anxious to go back inside. Cries of "MAMA!!! Hold me!" rang through the car and Annery tried to remain calm and buckle the devastated child into her seat. SB continued to sob, as Annery walked around to the driver's side of the car.
Trying to calm SB, Annery reached a hand back to hold her little hand as she drove. The crying gradually lessened. Slowly, the sweet girl seemed to catch her breath. Annery reminded SB that she is loved and missed, but that it wasn't Mommy's turn to have her right now. This seemed to sink in a little, and eventually, SB was singing along with Adele.
The drive came to an end and Annery helped SB into her house. SB seemed happy on her arrival. Annery covered SB's face in kisses and promised to see her in a few days. Then, she composed herself to spend the evening with her other daughters and niece. Parting never gets easier. Especially when there's a tiny child begging you to stay.
It's been a hard year. Some days are better than others. Some moments in the same day are better than others. Really, this year, I am most thankful for my family and friends. Not in the, "they're so nice to have around" kind of way. While that is true, I'm thankful for them this year in a, "I don't know how I would get out of bed without all their support" kind of way.
They've been understanding of my foul moods and coaxed me out of myself when I started to slip into depression. I don't like to ask for help, and I don't like to show my pain, but they have stepped up to walk with me through this dark time. They've been patient with my mood swings and let many a snide comment pass as my grief manifested itself in ungraceful ways.
As much as my faith has buoyed me through this time, my family has been the visible face of it when the darkness closes in around me and the prayers dry up.
My father made a toast this year at Thanksgiving, thanking my mother for her faith in God. He said looking around the table, he could see the fruition of that faith. My parents didn't have us because they were wealthy and it was easy, they trusted in God for His providence, patience, and love, and this Thanksgiving, many of us gathered around that table and my father could see the fruits of that trust.
So, if you do nothing else, put faith in God for your family. If there is no time of sowing, there is no time of reaping. God is faithful. I say that to you, having seen my parents' sacrifices for us, and in the midst of offering up the loss of my child. God is faithful, and there will be much fruit. If you don't accept the burden, you'll miss the blessing.
My father thanking my mother for her faith in growing our family |
This was beautiful. I am so so sorry for everything you are going through with Sweet Baby right now. Hugs, my friend.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much :)
DeleteThat last part is beautiful. We are thinking of you and praying for you and Sweet Baby rightnow.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteMy heart is in my throat and I am just aching for you. That was the most heart wrenching post... To turn the sorrow into a beautiful lesson. I know that can't make it any easier but your writing is touching.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much - writing does help.
DeleteI can't imagine how gut-wrenching this must be for you. You are in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteThank you Laura.
DeleteRough. I am sorry.
ReplyDeleteThanks, it's definitely been a time when we're leaning on the support of others.
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